Magazines
by SingsongRandom
Summary: Elphie finds herself with a dilemma once she becomes preoccupied with magazines. I am particularly proud of my use of onomatopoeia in this one-shot. Please read and review! Thanks!


**Disclaimer: I don't own Wicked.**

**Author's Note: This was my very first fanfiction! But I'm rewriting most of my current stories. So, here's the revised version! Please review, and enjoy!**

Magazines

Elphaba sat cross-legged on her bed, with her pointed green nose buried in a book as usual. She was particularly engrossed in this one; it was a nonfiction read written by one of Doctor Dillamond's own college professors, and spoke about the difficulties faced by so many during The Great Drought. Meanwhile, on the other side of the room, Elphaba's roommate Galinda smacked her lips together with a loud _POP!_, trying out various new lip glosses.

After another _POP!_, Galinda found the perfect shade of pink and decided that no more application was in order. She turned around from her vanity and looked at her friend. "Whatchya reading, Elphie?" she asked.

Elphaba looked up, surprised. She had hardly heard Galinda. "What?"

"I said, 'Whatchya reading, Elphie?'"

Still slightly distracted by the fascinating pieces of information she was adding to her collection of knowledge, Elphaba answered bluntly, "A book."

Galinda sighed. "I could see that."

"Well then why did you ask?" Elphaba said this more as a statement than a question, while her eyes remained glued to the book.

Galinda gave another sigh and twirled as she retreated back to her own bed, finally landing face first on the frilly comforter. Realizing this brought about no reaction from her roommate, Galinda turned on her side and heaved another sigh, louder this time. Elphaba's only response was turning the page in her book.

Now Galinda, more determined, stood and approached Elphaba's bed, and with the largest and loudest sigh of them all, dropped her head onto the book.

Elphaba groaned. "Dare I ask, what do you want, Galinda?"

"We have no classes today -"

"Obviously. If we had classes today then that's where I would be."

Standing up straight, Galinda smoothed the wrinkles in her dress. "If you'd kindly let me finish, you would know that I was about to ask why you're all cooped up in here."

Finding no clever remark to make at that moment, Elphaba answered simply with, "I'm enjoying this book."

Galinda wanted to talk. And not only did she want to talk, but she wanted someone else to listen. "I like books too." she said somewhat absentmindedly.

"You do?" Elphaba asked, somewhat in disbelief. The girls had been in school an entire semester already and she had never seen her friend with a book in hand. _Not even school books_, Elphaba thought.

"As a matter of fact, I do." said Galinda, with an air of confidence. "I like the really thin ones with lots of pictures."

Elphaba chortled. "Those are magazines, Galinda."

"What's the difference?"

Elphaba sighed and marked the page in her own book, then placed it at the foot of the bed. "Do you really need me to explain it to you?"

Galinda nodded innocently.

"Okay," said Elphaba. "A book is - bigger, and…it doesn't come out weekly or monthly, it comes out once. Not all books have pictures, although some do, and most often, books don't contain articles as magazines do, and books are usually written by one or two authors, while magazines have more contributors."

"Oh." said Galinda.

After a few silent moments, Galinda realized the weight of keeping up the conversation was on her own shoulders, and asked, "So, Elphie...what's your favorite magazine?"

Elphaba shrugged. "I don't really read magazines."

Galinda gasped. "You don't?" Elphaba shook her head. Galinda thought for a moment and then grinned. "Well, I have a whole bunch that you could go through, if you wanted to."

Elphaba's brows furrowed. "No, that's okay, really."

Galinda leaped off her bed and disappeared in her closet. Elphaba was somewhat relieved that she could get back to her own reading. But before she knew it, her roommate had reappeared holding a stack of magazines.

"What's that?" asked Elphaba curiously.

"Magazines." said Galinda. "I always have the most popular ones. I thought you might want to take a look at them."

_She doesn't listen to anything I say at all, does she?_ Elphaba thought to herself. She knew she wasn't going to get any more reading done, so she reluctantly stood up and walked over to her friend. "Okay, fine."

"Oh, this one is the _Gillikin Times_ - from last week. Then there's this one, _Ozian Digest_. Ooh! And this one, _Wizard's World_ - from this week. The Wizard himself is the editor-in-chief of this one."

Elphaba's eyes widened and she grabbed the _Wizard's World_ magazine. The cover featured a stout, gray-haired man - The Wizard - wearing an emerald tailcoat with silver buttons and a top hat to match. Elphaba smiled in admiration, noticing every detail. His button-like nose, rosy cheeks, and the hot-air balloon in the background with a banner that read _Wonderful! _The magazine portrayed him almost as cartoon-character like, Elphaba realized. It made no difference to her, she was too in awe of the fact of the matter itself. "This is the Wizard's magazine? That's…amazing."

Galinda giggled. "It's not all that amazing, Elphie. Lots of people are subscribed to his magazine."

Elphaba flipped through it, skimming the pages as quickly as she could. "Can you communicate with the Wizard through this magazine?" she asked hopefully. Galinda gave her a funny look. "I don't know. I guess so."

Elphaba smiled widely. "Galinda…Could I borrow this one?"

Galinda giggled and nodded. "Of course!" She said. "You know what? Keep it."

"Thanks," she said and began to read from page 1. "Wow. It's all news about the Wizard, his lifestyle, his innovations…"

Galinda was amused by her friend's sudden preoccupation with the magazine. "Yeah, that one's okay. I like these ones better, though." She flipped to a page in _Ozmopolitan_ with a title in bold letters that read, "BEST AND WORST DRESSED AT THE OZZY AWARDS."

"What was she thinking with that dress?" the girl muttered to herself. "A floor-length swamp brown with a ruffled bodice! It's...it's...unethical! It's hideoteous."

Elphaba was now into the _Wizard's World_ magazine. "How can I get a subscription, Galinda?" she asked. "This is such a wonderful…piece of literature!"

Galinda handed her friend the order form to start receiving magazines and said, "Elphie, it's just a magazine."

Elphaba didn't seem to hear her. She was already scribbling her name and other information down to start getting _Wizard's World_ delivered.

Not long after getting a subscription to _Wizard's World_, Elphaba found that her grades began to drop. When asked to "please put away the magazine during my class, Miss Elphaba," she would sneakily hide it underneath the desk and continue to read. She became so obsessed with the publication that she would reread certain articles two and three times. Concerned with the effect the magazine had on Elphaba's academics, Doctor Dillamond called Galinda after class.

"Miss Glinda, would you be able to -"

"Not until you pronounce my name right," said the blonde, folding her arms.

The Goat professor sighed. "Miss Glinda -"

"Still wrong. It's GAlinda. You have to say the 'a.'"

Dr. Dillamond groaned. "Kchh-linda."

Galinda sighed. "Close enough."

Dr. Dillamond said, "It seems Miss Elphaba has lost interest in her studies lately. Would you be able to maybe talk to her? I think it's those magazines."

Galinda bounced down the hall to her room where she found Elphaba reading the _Wizard's World_ magazine. _What a surprise. _"Hey, Elphie. Whatchya doing?"

Elphaba looked at Galinda, who sat on her bed. "I'm taking a quiz in this issue of Wizard's World."

Galinda's eyebrows furrowed. "Oh, really?" She asked. "What result did you get?"

Elphaba laughed. "I got: The Magic Grand Vizier!"

"I don't get it. What kind of quiz was it?"

"It was called 'What Would You Be if You Worked in the Wizard's Palace?'" Elphaba replied with a low laugh that slightly gave Galinda the creeps.

The blonde sighed. "It's time to forget about the magazine, Elphie. Your grades are dropping."

"Why do you care about my grades?" Elphaba unintentionally snapped.

There was a short pause. "Well I don't," Galinda admitted, "but if I don't try and help you then that mispronouncing Goat is never going to get off my case." With a smile, Galinda inched closer to her friend. "So it seems I'm going to have to just slip this from your grasp -"

"NO!" Elphaba swatted Galinda's hand away. Galinda looked taken aback.

"Elphie, give me the magazine!"

"NO!"

"I'll cancel your subscription."

Elphaba looked cross. "You wouldn't dare," she growled. Galinda nodded. "Try me!"

Galinda reached for the magazine again and this time grabbed it, the two girls played a game of tug-of-war for it.

"You're going to rip my magazine!" Elphaba shouted.

And she was right, as eventually the issue tore in two, and Elphaba was left with half a magazine. Her shoulders slumped. Galinda gave her a sympathetic look and patted her friend on the back. "It's for the best."

The girls had finished arguing and called a truce. Elphaba sat up straight on her bed while Galinda calmly paced in front of her.

"I'll stop bringing my magazines to class."

"And?" Galinda insisted.

"I'll get my grades up again, and keep them up."

"And?"

"I'll stop obsessing over _Wizard's World_."

"And?"

Elphaba sighed and went over to her closet, which was mostly barren except for a few dresses and...a stack of magazines. The pile of magazines was heavy so she threw them out the open window with all her might.

Galinda smiled at her friend. "Thanks, Elphie."

Elphaba chuckled. "No, thank you!"

And all of a sudden, they heard a loud _THUD!_ and immediately turned to look out the window.

There was Boq, covered in pieces of paper.

"I'm okay!" he hollered. Galinda just shook her head and Elphaba shrugged. "I am so glad that's over..."


End file.
